Love – the “L” word.
It carries a lot of power.
When my wife and I were first dating, I really felt I loved her almost right away. But, I was too chicken to say it!
She was unlike anyone I had ever dated, but social conditioning and just plain not wanting to freak her out made me wait to say it.
One night we were hanging out at her house and I managed to squeak out, “I really loooiiiike you”. It was a combination of love and like.
I couldn’t bring myself to say the ‘L’ word just yet. Luckily, she got the point of what I was doing.
It was then that we both realized we were feeling the same way. We knew we actually loved each other but thought it was too soon to say it.
Long story short, we got over it! We were married only 7 months later and will complete 10 years of marital bliss this July.
Why Saying “I Love You” Is So Important
I’ve never been one to use the words “I love you” casually. I’ve heard people using it in place of a ‘good bye’ on the phone.
For some reason, I’ve always thought that cheapens it somehow.
I mean, saying the ‘L’ word should come from your soul right?
When we were married, my great uncle told us to say ‘I love you’ every night before going to sleep. Again, I didn’t know why, but somehow turning the ‘L’ word into a nightly routine like brushing my teeth seemed to take away from it.
That said, I’ve come to learn that it’s not as much about how often or when you say it as much as it is about how you use it and the meaning behind it.
If you say it every night or on the phone it doesn’t matter so long as it’s real.
Saying the ‘L’ word is so important because it reaffirms to you and to your partner your feelings for each other. It helps you stay mindful of your marriage.
Beyond that, it’s just plain nice to love and to be loved!
Some Quick Ways to Use the ‘L’ Word
So how can you avoid making a routine of the ‘L’ word but still say it frequently? Here are just a few ways you can say it on an everyday basis while still making it meaningful.
Handwritten letter – this is an oldie but a goodie. Probably as old as it gets!
Post-it notes – very similar to a handwritten letter but more fun to place somewhere obvious (or not so obvious).
On the phone – go ahead and say ‘I love you’ on the phone. Tip: say your spouse’s name, pause just a minute, and then say it.
Text – a random loving text may be just the thing your partner needs.
Before going to sleep – make the last words you say each day be loving ones. Tip: make sure he or she is still awake!
When leaving for work or school – it’s a great way to enter the world for the day.
Spell it out…with food – literally, shape breakfast, lunch or dinner foods into hearts or loving messages.
Being Mindful of the ‘L’ Word
By making a point to say ‘I love you’ is to remember the special feelings you have for your partner.
The love I have for my wife has increased so much over the years. Growing together through work, kids, and life adventures has deepened our feelings.
Now we just have to remember to tell each other!
Say the ‘L’ word. Make frequent and meaningful use of it. Your marriage will thank you.
What about you? What are some ways you say the ‘L’ word every day?